I tried to put a content-filled entry up yesterday (well, as content-filled as my entries get), I really did, but I just wasn't in a very bloggy place. Discovering that the Federal government had singled the Grace and Wayne household out for very bad things (think 8mm), I just couldn't get myself up for an entry that interested even me, and I'm simple people (not like my wit-tastic readers). I made the mistake of tackling my taxes on an empty stomach, and it was ugly.

You see, I'm poor people. I may not seem to count as really poor, as the lovely Mrs. Grace and Wayne and I are students, but when the direct deposit comes, we might as well be short-order chefs (but without the nifty hats). However, the federal government seems to have decided that we have money to burn, and decided to use us exclusively to fund the war peace in the middle east. Suffice to say this made me sad, and so I thought it best not to subject anyone else to my lame-itude. I think the tax thing will be fine, though, as I have a couple of offers from a some bankers overseas. I am just going to hold their funds, and they will send me a couple million bucks. I just need to find my account numbers...

with that said...I present to you:

A Cub's game recap

Lots of interesting things happened yesterday, many of which were fully baseball related. Which, I think, is good seeing as I front as a baseball site (as if there is anywhere near enough baseball content for such a label) .

The Good

Well, the best news was that the Cubs won. The first televised game of the season (I, of course, missed it for stupid work) and the Cubs demonstrated their impressive array of talents by bullying the Texas Rangers on their way to a 9-4 victory.

The Gooder

Jason DuBois - Cruising the box score, we see that good ol' J-Doob (please God, don't let that nickname stick) had a 2 for 3 night, including a homer. Reports from those that actually witnessed the feat note that the ball was truly crushed, a shot of epic proportions. Ruthian, if you will (hmm, maybe I'm overselling a bit). He did, however, fail to knock in a couple of runners with 2 outs (if only he had more veteran presence) which shows he may not possess the level of clutchiness we all seek. Only time will tell.

Dave Hansen also continued his drive for that all-important last spot on the bench with an rbi triple that he absolutely smoked down the line (or so I heard). I am rooting for Dave Hansen. He has always been an absolute professional, and has built a very nice career out of knowing his role and excelling off the bench. What he lacks in power he makes up for by getting on base, and it would be nice to have a pinch hitter that can actually reach first on occasion.

The Goodest

The Pitching - was solid. Maddux, in an attempt to shed himself of his need for his security blanket, pitched to Michael Barrett and did alright, only giving up a couple of unearned runs. The better performances were from LaTroy, Leicester, and JoBo. I expect good things this year out of LaTroy and Leicester, but I wanted to keep my virtual eye on Borowski to see how he was throwing in his comeback from shoulder surgury. Turns out, not too badly. He was quite wild with his first batter, walking him on six pitches, most of which weren't particularily close, but recovered to retire the rest in order. Advanced scouts over at the Cub Reporter indicate that his fastball was clocked in the high 80's, and his slider in the low 80's. Not bad and a far cry from the low 80's fastball he sported last summer. If JoBo comes back successfully, he may earn the covetted "Official Pitcher of From the Corner of Grace and Wayne."

and now...

The Bad

Corey Patterson went down after taking a fastball to the knee. The moment that this happened, I felt a great disturbance in the Cub's Blog Army, like a million Cub fans crying out in unison. The X-Rays were negative (which is positive) and he will probably just have a second head sprouting from his knee. That is two pitches that have threatened the season of a couple of our best players. I would be pretty happy if this trend stopped here.

The Worse

Jose Macias took over in center for Corey, and played the rest of the game there. What do Dusty and co. continue to see in this guy?!? He's slow, has no power, won't take a walk, can't hit for average, doesn't defend all that well, and he is kind of ugly. He isn't even all that filled with veteran presence. I just don't get it. And they are paying this no-talent ass clown a million bucks for his effort. I mean, I would play for just half that, and at least I am devastingly handsome (which would come in handy team calendar time).

So, all in all, there were more goods than bads, and so we can all be happy with a lovely Cub win. If only any of this counted for anything.

And now, in news around the globe...

King Tut was not murdered. I mean, he's still dead, the death just wasn't due to foul play. Thus putting to bed a case that has rocked the Nile community for centuries. Clearing this up should help towards cleaning up the Middle East's reputation for violence and corruption. I'm expecting a tourism boom.

In blogo-news, The White House credentialed its first blogger. He just kept annoying them until they let him in and with that news, I launch my campaign to flood Jim Hendry's mailbox (just kidding, I'm no journalist. That would require integrity and insight (just kidding, sports journalism requires neither of those qualities, I'm just lazy)).

but, of actual importance to a certain someone (me): Blogger fired from job for blogging. Yikes. With that news, I give you my likes and dislikes:

my likes:

• physics
• particle collisions
• Department of Energy
• Canadians
  

dislikes

• Blogging while at work (please don't look at time stamp, please don't look at time stamp...)
• slackers who slack (I mean you, slacker!)
• possessing life outside physics

Alright, that's all from here. I think I made up for a lack of coherent thought or logically consistent argument with a sheer volume of words. I am the Wal-Mart of blogging.