Friday, April 01, 2005


I like big Blogs and I cannot lie

...I've already posted once today, but I think we can all agree MORE is always better (semicolon close-parenthesis).

(link to my season predictions)
(link to my Cub predictions)

From the files of "really, really awesome things that happened yesterday":

Pat Buchanon doused in salad dressing, Jason pees a drop after hearing of this

Pat Buchanon, the giant human ass, was no doubt giving his famous speech "Mexicans are bad, and let me tell you why" when some wacky liberal hurled what appears to be (judging from the picture) Ranch Dressing (but god help us all if that was Caesar dressing).

This coming on the heals of noted conservative William "don't call me Billy" Kristol taking a pie in the face while giving a speech to a bunch of Quakers. Okay, so let's recap and see what we can learn. Arch-conservative media hounds are booked at small colleges; liberal youths coat conservatives with food products. It seems that Democrats have finally mastered some useful debate skills. Republicans have long been the masters of juvenile debate tactics (name calling, interrupting, condecending smirks) and Democrats have always tried to appeal to the intellectual side of the voters (I think we can all agree that's a bad idea). Now that the left has decided to come down to the level of their Republican counter-parts, I think they have a chance of winning in '08.

Turning to less happy news...

Pontifs and Nose Tubes (never thought you would read that, did you?)

Not to be glib, but it is possible that there were some alterior motives in the Pope declaring feeding tube removal immoral, as his has one up his nose right now keeping him alive.

The Pope is in very poor condition. His blood pressure is wavering more than Judas's voice when confronted by Jesus after he sold Christ out to Ciaiphas (hmm, that joke killed in 42 AD) and his fever is reading "brimstone" on the thermometer.

The Pope has receive last rights and is reaching the end of his time on this mortal coil.

I'm probably going to Hell for it, but your Judas/Ciaiphas line almost caused me to do a holy wine spit-take. (Okay, I'm going to Hell for a NUMBER of things.)
Good call on the Patty-Patty-Buch-Buch take, as well.
I went to Catholic School, mass 6 days a week, and can honesty say this man has been the best pope of my lifetime. Let's hope he goes with a little more dignity than Terry S., and hope the College of Cardinals (Give me a C! Give me an A! . . . ) can hold off at least until Opening Day to send their smoke signals. (Imagine what THAT is going to be like in the era of fifteen 24-hour news channels. God help us all.)

Oh, and Go Cubs!
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